On Apologies: A Poor Man's Taxonomy
I have gotten confused and frustrated over apologies from time to time. They have been a consistent source of miscommunication. I figured that it isn’t clear to me what an apology means in the general case. Hence I tried to distinguish possible meanings in more concrete cases.
- I ‘regret’ my action and given the hypothetical chance to undo it, I would.
- I preferred you not having to bear the negative consequences of my action. Yet, given the the hypothetical chance to undo it, I wouldn’t.
- I will tell you anything to temporarily satisfy you without caring or investing any real effort.
I think the source of my confusion and frustration was assuming something rather close to (1) by default, without reason to do so. I guess a classic expectation management issue!
Going forward, I should put more effort in trying to distinguish the meaning in real-time.